Okay, we’ve heard quite a bit about how ego sucks and you must drop it and do what you have to and that your ego will destroy your relationships and it’s your worst enemy. I don’t deny that all of It is true. I myself really detest egoistic people because I feel like they’re too self absorbed to be sensitive towards what other people need and that they don’t recognise that everyone needs the same things as them. They’re just takers and not givers and it’s hard to maintain any kind of relationship with them because they refuse to make any effort and build a wall around themselves which is really hard to get through. Plus it just puts you off so much after a point that you don’t even feel like trying to get to know them better. They feel this constant need for everything to revolve around them, which is practically impossible but they still want it anyway. They find it difficult to let anyone in so they evolve pretty late in life too. And then again, all the tantrums, you must text them because their fingers hurt too much if they do it themselves, and then they’ll get mad at you if you don’t. They’re pretty much in conflict with themselves. But sometimes, quite honestly, a little bit of ego, maybe you can call it a magnified version of self respect is required for quite a few reasons.
- Standing up for yourself:
People with no ego usually don’t mind anything. I’m one of them so I know. Anything works for people like us, next level compromising and all. But the problem is people usually take advantage of that instead of valuing it. You’re going to end up doing what everyone else wants on most days if not all of them because they know you’re not going to throw any tantrums or create any issues. So they’ll just mostly treat your opinion as null and void which isn’t cool at all. It sounds very mean when I say it like this but this is how it actually works. So you better make it clear that your opinions are as important as theirs.
- Carrying excess emotional burden:
Just because you don’t say it doesn’t mean that it never crosses your mind that you’re the only one making all the effort in most of your relationships ; Always taking the initiative to make a plan, being the first one to call, the first to apologise, first to be up for anything. Being adjusting isn’t all that easy. You’re just the same person as all the others and with the same emotional make up just that you choose to put your ego aside each time or you probably don’t have it at all. You’ll often wonder where all of this is getting you and you’ll have no answer. It’s not your responsibility to carry all that baggage really. Why do it anyway?
- Always being the one to surrender:
Irrespective of whether you’re right or wrong, you’ll always be the one to end the argument on a happy note or at least trying. You’ll give up your stand if you have to because you just want peace and quiet. You don’t particularly enjoy arguing or dealing with pointless confrontations so you just drop your stand and you’re like you’re right and now let’s just get this over with. This honestly just promotes their ego and doesn’t mend things at all. Plus you begin to get tired of the person because how much can you take really?
- Makes you more firm and stable:
Anyone with no ego will always be a little too driven by their hearts. They want to follow their hearts irrespective of where it takes them. You’re too forgiving, you want to let go of any grudges or any negativity that you’ve been entangled in. But because you’ve got such a big heart you keep accommodating unnecessary people into it and eventually end up making a lot of mistakes in terms of choosing people. You keep forgiving the wrong people and allow them to hurt you all over again. You give way too many chances, more than they deserve. Instead if you choose to be a little firm and develop some ego you’ll be a little more relieved in this respect.
- Not allowing anyone to take you for granted:
You have to recognise that you did not come into the world to feed someone’s ego and you must make that very clear to everyone else too. Just because you’re nicer and not unnecessarily creating a mess out of everything doesn’t mean anyone can treat you any way they want. You’re probably the easiest person to get along with so they’re pretty damn lucky to have you, send them that reminder every once in a while if they forget. It’s not your job to be nice, you can get things done your way too and you don’t have to be subtle about it.