Parents are the ones who brought us into this world; they are in place of God for us. But it often happens that we end up fighting with our parents. We won’t agree on a topic and then the whole bunch of discussion would go on leading to fights. When I say fight I mean arguments.
We are in a habit of having an argument with our parents and then when we have forgotten it or we feel guilty we say sorry to our parents and become normal. But for our parents, it hurts them so much. You say something; don’t mean it there and then but the words you have uttered to them will stay in their hearts forever.
Just put yourself in their place and imagine what you would feel? Definitely you will not feel good. Just imagine that someone you have cared for life; gave them whatever you could; just did things for their happiness and suddenly that person shouts at you over some petty issue.
I am not saying here who is correct or who is not but the thing is we end up fighting hurting both of us. Just remember whether we were 5 year old, 10 year old or 15 year old or 20 years old or more (I don’t have personal experience of it but have seen it) we always demand from our parents. Sometimes we want them to buy some expensive gifts or do this or do that for us. Leave the above facts, I think now as we began understanding life, i.e. being mature we end up fighting with them on getting permission for something or the other or wanting something to be done in our own way.
I just want you to realize your parents’ importance in your life. Imagine a day without them. You would dare not. I don’t even need to mention the implications of this dream.
I know dealing with them at times become difficult, but you need to care for them. That is what they deserve after showering years of love on you and that too selflessly. All they want is that you spend time with them, love them, pay attention to them, and to know that you care for them and nothing else. You would say we all do this, but the fact is our parents know but they want us to show it to them. You need to express your love and gratitude for your parents and let them know what you feel for them.
Here are certain factors you must keep in mind and think of them whenever you are angry with your parents.
Don’t think that your parents will agree to whatever you say. Just think of their times. At those times the values were different for people and they have their own set of beliefs. Understand that it is quite difficult for them to change their perception on matter on what they had believed since their childhood. They have already changed a lot from their times and you must respect and appreciate them for it.
Want to get a permission for something? Just don’t say harshly. Sit with them, talk to them, put forward your viewpoints, your arguments but politely. Listen to what they have to say. Have answers for their questions and give them time to think and convince themselves. This is the best strategy for getting permission for something you think your parents won’t allow.
Listen to them and learn from their experiences
You need to understand the fact that whatever they are saying is saying out of concern for you and not for imposing some sort of restrictions on you. They have lived more than you, have more experience and you must benefit from it. Learn from their experiences, practice it and you’ll feel the goodness in your life.
If you want to live a happy and healthy life you have to keep your parents happy. Then only you can be happy and keep others around you happy. It is your duty and their right. I am not saying to do whatever they want, instead argue with them politely, let them know your aim and dreams and they only will help you in achieving them.
And yeah sometimes or some days just do everything for them. They’ll love it and you’ll love their love on you and the energy you get afterwards. Small things like going for shopping with your mom, helping dad, cooking food, serving breakfast, going to relatives you don’t like , giving them good surprises on birthday, anniversary etc will win their heart and you’ll love the affection. You already are the most important person in their lives; let them know that even they are also important for you.
Lastly, don’t wait for special occasions such as Mother’s day or Father’s day or birthdays, care for them every day and every now and then make sure to express your feelings for them. Then surely you’ll be residing in heaven.