Ever since the human settlements came into existence, marriages have been given the position of the strongest bond on the planet and an unbreakable one. Marriage is considered and stated to be one of the oldest institutions of humankind. But with the emerging world, this flame of marriage is dwindling in the reality. The tallow candle of marriage is fainting as the shadows of modernization are thickening all around it. It is not a new thing when we see people getting married, getting divorced, getting married for the second time, have a child, divorce again, marry another person and continue the cycle. Is this how the modern world defines marriage, a unified bond between two people? Certainly not is what my perspective is.
Another school of thought promotes the agenda of live-in relationships. You live with your partner without getting married to the person. We are unsure about the authenticity of this proposition as well. Whether it is prudent to be in a live-in relationship or to be in a married bond, one has to analyze and decide. To help this decision making, here are the pros and cons of both schools of thoughts:
Advantages Of Marriage
Marriage and wedding is the most celebrated occasion of a person’s life especially in a nation like India, where people consider this as an act decided by the lord almighty.
Marriages help you maintain your dynasty. It is always a better thought to have a child legally than to have an illegitimate child, troubling yourself and your child as well. You have the pleasure of creating your family, take responsibilities and mature with time. Marriages help you grow as a person and give you the sense of living for someone else. You think not only about yourself but also about your family.
Marriages help you to get stability in your existence. You get social respect and you can proudly walk the streets with your spouse’s hand in your hand without thinking about what the people would say, how the society would view this. You certainly don’t have this freedom in a live-in relationship. Of course you can walk hand in hand but there would be no social sanctity.
A marriage does a world of good to your children. Your children are brought up in the most fruitful manner and atmosphere. They are well behaved and have respect for the societal norms whereas in live in relationships you often don’t see the children being well mannered and showing respect to the society rules and norms.
Marriages make you a civilized human being. You become a part of your society in a happy way. You have sense of respect towards the society and its working. You don’t end up questioning the existing practices and end up being soft target for verbal attacks of the society as in the case of living relationship.
Lastly, marriages do not only unify two people. It is a bond between two families. With the knot of marriage being tied, both the families become one and this is the foundation of a bigger and jovial atmosphere. Marriages are regarded as a heavenly bond by all religions, be it Islam or Christianity or Hinduism, all religious texts regard this as a pious relationship. And by being a part of a successful marriage, you obey the religions and go against the sacred texts. No religion promotes sleeping with someone without getting married. In the Judaism sacred text, it is clearly stated, “A life without marrying is a less holy, less complete, and a less Jewish life.”
Disadvantages of Marriages
You can never have an ideal object or a thing in this world. There are always flaws even in the most perfectly carved statue. In the same way, even marriages have a few disadvantages. The biggest one of them is the sense of “I” and not “we”. This in simple terms is called as an individual thought or being egoistic. If even one of the partners has a big ego, clashes are bound to happen. You always have the inferiority complex with your partner in case they earn more than you or if they have a holiday on a hard working day of yours. In such a situation, your individuality is the biggest hurdle between your coexistence and makes you a grumpy person.
A marriage means sharing of everything. You have to share your experiences, your income and everything else. But if this ego exists, all this becomes a burden for you and you are no longer a happy person.
Moreover, in case your fights do not cease at some stage of point and the saturation levels begin to explode, your married life may end up ending on the wrong side. This dark wrong side of marriage in the most legal terms is called as a divorce. A divorce never does well to you. It’s a blemish on your married life and on your personality. Sure, you have the option of finding a new partner after your first failed marriage. But what uniqueness will the term marriage have in your life? Marriage is something that sounds sweet to everyone else if it is one time experience. If you do it again and again, you better not marry. Live-in is the way for you to go. Be bold and brave enough and take the call.
To summarize, it is better to be in a live-in relationship and be unmarried than to be married without knowing what it actually means and end up being a blotch on the society.