The world has never ever experienced a relationship that hasn’t had it’s rough patches. No relationship remains unchallenged throughout it’s course because conflicts are bound to happen when two people of different backgrounds, expectations, desires become one. Conflicts can only be avoided if one of the two persons in the relationship give up their own needs and requirements and live off by rules which seem more convenient to the other person, which happens almost never. In this whole process of disagreements which leads to conflict and friction in a relationship, the people involved sometimes take things a bit too far. A word here, a taunt there and it all comes falling apart. And when they do realize that they need to save what’s falling apart, most of the damage has already been done. So here are ways, for you to work on a relationship that is not going as it should and needs immediate attention. You have to work on your own relationship because of a simple reason that no one else is gonna do it for you and you’ll be the one at loss in the long run. Now or never.
1) Be respectful.
A lot of times, people tend to neglect the extent to which they go while arguing with another person. At times, words leave a greater wound behind than actions do. Always keep in mind, even if you’re having a heated argument with someone you’re related to, never say something that is beyond the areas of reconciliation. Do not use words that are derogatory in nature and might offend the other person to such an extent that your relationship with is damaged beyond repair. Insulting a person is uncivilized and very repelling. Behaving in a manner which only puts you in a bad light is the last thing you want to do. So, always be respectful and you might just save your relationship.
2) Do not have too many expectations.
As an equally important person in a relationship, you might have some expectations of the other person. Sometimes these expectations could be unrealistic for the other person. It’s safe to say that these expectations could be standing in the way of your relationship and preventing you from embracing it. Having too many expectations only lead to disappointments when they’re not fulfilled. This is another reason for losing interest in the person and feeling aloof in the relationship. So do not expect something which your partner is not capable of doing for you, to save yourself the feeling of discontentment.
3) Don’t put the blame on each other.
Blaming each other for things that have happened in the past triggers differences. Nobody likes being blamed for creating unpleasant situations, especially in a relationship. Blaming is like walking in a totally different direction that your destination. Accepting your mistakes is the first step towards reconciliation. Blaming each other is only like putting a false curtain over your own misdeeds. To have a comfortable relationship, you need to visualize it and start working towards creating it. Let bygones be bygones and start towards a new beginning.
4) No false promises.
Be realistic. Do not talk of attaining heights together or living a dreamlike life straight out of the movies. Promises like these exist only in the movies and let them be where they suit best. Giving high hopes to someone when you’re not even sure of what the future hold for you isn’t the best thing you want to do while trying to save a struggling relationship. It does take a lot of effort to get a relationship back on track. You’ve gotta work like a madman but being honest and real is definitely the key to success.
5) The art of forgiving.
You need to master this art if you haven’t as yet. Forgiving requires a lot of courage and faith. You need to trust the person to forgive him completely. You need to trust his promise of trying to make things better than before. You have to forget and let go of all the negatives you had been holding onto for such a long period of time. Forgiving means no looking back. When you decide to forgive someone, you close the past chapters completely and resolve to never bring anything up from the past again. This art paves way for a new beginning and starting afresh with all your worries washed off. Forgiving definitely makes it easier to start off again without the wounds of past bothering you.
6) Remain hopeful.
Believe in the relationship and that it does have what it takes to be a successful one. Do not doubt your partner’s intentions and discard the relationship just when the problems begin to sprout up. Always think that your partner is equally eager to restore what has been lost. There are no such conflicts that are beyond salvation. Focus on the qualities of your partner and and think about all the good times you had in the relationship. That might bring in the much required motivation back into the scene and make you even more eager to work towards getting the relationship back on track.